Your children "look delicious", writes angry neighbor

On the one hand, the note is not so good.

On the other hand, a pearl-clutching, hyperventilating think of the children - and in particular, my children parent.

So I’m siding with the pseudo-cannibal.

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I can’t believe no one has posted this yet, c’mon fellow geezers!

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Rule #1: Do not serve brat on a hot dog bun! Brats are eaten on a brat bun, or in Sheboygan, on a Sheboygan hard roll, which is based on a Bavarian semmel roll. Brat buns resemble hot dog buns, but are larger and more substantial and chewy, and are designed to hold a single brat. Sheboygan hard rolls are moderate-sized round buns, suited to the Sheboygan-style double-brat sandwich. In Sheboygan, most folks put two brats on a round roll. In the rest of Wisconsin, they put one brat on a brat bun. Both types have a golden brown surface and are substantial enough to hold onto the brats, condiments, and for most folks in Sheboygan - lots of butter (This is not low-calorie cuisine). For those of you who live outside Wisconsin, it can be nearly impossible to find a proper brat bun or Sheboygan hard roll, so you’ll have to take matters into your own hands.

Rule #2: Do not put yellow mustard on a brat! It is an abomination. The classic mustard for brats is a brown Wisconsin German-style Düsseldorf, medium to dark in color and pungency, slightly sweet-sour and sometimes flavored with herbs. Dijon is also nice.

Beyond those two rules, which are widely accepted in Wisconsin, there are differences of opinion, especially between Sheboygan (self-proclaimed Bratwurst Capital of the World), and the rest of the state.
The Bratwurst Pages Home

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I feel like I gained weight just reading that.

Not that I’m complaining. If I have anything to complain about it’s that the local bakery won’t have more kolaches until tomorrow morning.

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If there was a shred of evidence that even a single warning like you describe had been issued, I’d be more sympathetic to the neighbor. As it is, it’s just as easy to imagine her being a freaky antisocial curmudgeon and going straight to Defcon One without preliminaries. Thing is, the actual reported story doesn’t provide enough information to draw any of these conclusions.

Lacking further information, the best conclusion I can come to is that everybody involved should have been slapped upside the head and told to behave like adults (for the adults) or just simply behave (for the children).

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Don’t forget the addition of sauerkraut!

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In fact, there’s fairly strong circumstantial evidence against. It seems as though no one knew the woman was responsible for the note. If she had publicly complained, presumably the parents might have put two and two together.

I have this sneaking suspicion that most people on the thread aren’t really trying to empathize with someone who:
a) is a parent of small children
b) receives a relatively threatening anonymous note in the mail

I don’t have children, but if a similar note appeared in my mailbox, I would be the wifebeater-clad shotgun wielder smoking a rollup on my porch.

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It’s a simple mistake, really. The kids were in the neighbour’s yard, and the mom shouted over, “Let’s eat kids!” She was probably just trying to be polite.

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Grammar saves lives.

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Why eat 'em when there are other useful applications?

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:notes: “Mind you don’t cut yerself, Mordichai”:notes:

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As a Wisconsinite, I approve this message.

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