Cap’n Crunch was my first crush.
I think the word might be ‘problematic.’
Ah, he’s a Captain in the Multinational Corporate Navy.
nor the brig.
Came here to say this, first thought was the legendary partakers, not the cereal
There appears to be some confusion here between rank in a service and role/title. You can be a Admiral and still be captain. In fact you can be a junior rating and be captain. If you are in charge of the vessel you are captain. Hence when Horatio Hornblower took charge of a prize vessel he was a midshipman. Nevertheless he was captain of the ship. Cap’n Crunch’s service record does not appear to be available on public record - if in fact he was Navy rather than say merchant marine. We should not impune him without strong evidence.
Ever heard of Major Major Major Major? He’s a character in Catch 22. Like Major Major Major Major, Cap’n is Crunch’s first name.
It’s the food named for him that’s rank.
Crap, I just posted the same. Ya’ beat me to it.
What will we do with a sugar-hyped sailor?
What will we do with a sugar-hyped sailor?
What will we do with a sugar-hyped sailor?
Early in the morning!
Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises
Early in the morning!
Fill his belly with high-fructose corn syrup
Fill his belly with high-fructose corn syrup.
Fill his belly with high-fructose corn syrup
Early in the morning!
Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises
Early in the morning!
Make him drink milk till his sober
Make him drink milk till his sober
Make him drink milk till his sober
Early in the morning!
Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises
Early in the morning!
Stick him on a cereal box with a toy at the bottom
Stick him on a cereal box with a toy at the bottom
Stick him on a cereal box with a toy at the bottom
Early in the morning!
Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises
Early in the morning!
Put him in your mouth with your bleeding gums
Put him in your mouth with your bleeding gums
Put him in your mouth with your bleeding gums
Early in the morning!
Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises
Early in the morning!
That’s what we do with a sailor of undetermined rank
That’s what we do with a sailor of undetermined rank
That’s what we do with a sailor of undetermined rank
Early in the morning!
Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises
Early in the morning!
Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises
Early in the morning!
He’s not a Captain. He’s a “Cap’n” which awards one three stripes. You can look this up the Quaker Oats Maritime Law Handbook.
Let’s see, what shall we market? Cap’n Corn Flakes? Cap’n Granola? Cap’n Cheerio? Cap’n Grape Nuts? C’mon, we have a deadline here, a real time crunch! Hmmm, maybe that’s it…
With so much going on in our beleaguered world today, it is ridiculous that this should even still be a matter of discussion.
The facts:
The Navy has announced in the past that they have no record of service for anyone named Horatio Magellan Crunch.
It is a known fact that Crunch was born on Crunch Island, which shows up nowhere in any territorial maps of the United States.
His ship, the Guppy, is not listed in any records of U.S. naval vessels, active or retired.
As the owner and pilot of a vessel he’s entitled to call himself Captain (or "Cap’n in the vernacular) if he so desires.
Finally, his apparel matches no uniform that the US Navy has ever issued; the eccentric 18th century tricorn hat and epaulettes lend us to believe that it is a frivolous costuming choice, made of his own volition.
I do hope that this matter can finally be laid to rest, and that we can get on to intelligently discussing the important and serious topics that daily impact our lives in these trying times.
I have a few first-hand Area 51 stories but if I told you, I’d have to abduct you.
Time Crunch would be an awesome cereal name!
flavorist Pamela Low…who by the way was also involved with the development of Almond Joy and Mounds, as well as the Heath bar, states she was attempting to come up with that ineffable quality known as “want more-ishness” with this particular product.
It seems weird that an actual person designed the flavor of Capn Crunch, Almond Joy, and Mounds, that they didn’t just ooze up from the primordial soup or the La Brea tar pits fully realized.
Yes.
