Alex Jones is suing the parents of a Sandy Hook victim for $100,000

Originally published at:


We need a new word to describe Alex Jones. Scum of the earth just doesn’t cover it.

Deceased. Deceased would be nice.

Car accident, slipped in the shower, eaten by crocodiles, I really don’t care how.


I honestly thought he was incapable of doing anything that would cause my opinion to sink any lower. He is constantly setting new, amazingly low definitions of assholery. Damn.


As long as it’s excruciatingly slow.


He is not a theorist, of conspiracies or otherwise, nor is he unhinged. He is a sociopathic grifter, end of story.


How about “turd slurper”?


Two Girls Alex Jones, One Cup


LOL. Let us know how that works out for you, buddy.

I don’t think the outcome will be in his favor.


It’s been done before, Alex.


The thing that lay half-bent on its side in a foetid pool of greenish-yellow ichor and tarry stickiness was almost nine feet tall, and the dog had torn off all the clothing and some of the skin. It was not quite dead, but twitched silently and spasmodically while its chest heaved in monstrous unison with the mad piping of the expectant whippoorwills outside. Bits of shoe-leather and fragments of apparel were scattered about the room, and just inside the window an empty canvas sack lay where it had evidently been thrown. Near the central desk a revolver had fallen, a dented but undischarged cartridge later explaining why it had not been fired. The thing itself, however, crowded out all other images at the time. It would be trite and not wholly accurate to say that no human pen could describe it, but one may properly say that it could not be vividly visualized by anyone whose ideas of aspect and contour are too closely bound up with the common life-forms of this planet and of the three known dimensions. It was partly human, beyond a doubt, with very manlike hands and head, and the goatish, chinless face had the stamp of the Whateley’s upon it. But the torso and lower parts of the body were teratologically fabulous, so that only generous clothing could ever have enabled it to walk on earth unchallenged or uneradicated.

Above the waist it was semi-anthropomorphic; though its chest, where the dog’s rending paws still rested watchfully, had the leathery, reticulated hide of a crocodile or alligator. The back was piebald with yellow and black, and dimly suggested the squamous covering of certain snakes. Below the waist, though, it was the worst; for here all human resemblance left off and sheer phantasy began. The skin was thickly covered with coarse black fur, and from the abdomen a score of long greenish-grey tentacles with red sucking mouths protruded limply.

Their arrangement was odd, and seemed to follow the symmetries of some cosmic geometry unknown to earth or the solar system. On each of the hips, deep set in a kind of pinkish, ciliated orbit, was what seemed to be a rudimentary eye; whilst in lieu of a tail there depended a kind of trunk or feeler with purple annular markings, and with many evidences of being an undeveloped mouth or throat. The limbs, save for their black fur, roughly resembled the hind legs of prehistoric earth’s giant saurians, and terminated in ridgy-veined pads that were neither hooves nor claws. When the thing breathed, its tail and tentacles rhythmically changed colour, as if from some circulatory cause normal to the non-human greenish tinge, whilst in the tail it was manifest as a yellowish appearance which alternated with a sickly grayish-white in the spaces between the purple rings. Of genuine blood there was none; only the foetid greenish-yellow ichor which trickled along the painted floor beyond the radius of the stickiness, and left a curious discoloration behind it.


And immensely painful.

Fingers crossed that they get crowd-funding to fight this unbelievable asshole and hopefully counter-sue.


He’s a microbe.


The judge presiding over his custody hearing didn’t seem to share that assessment.


FINALLY!!! Someone gets the Flavor-Aid thing right.


Did he not? I thought he successfully claimed to be an “entertainer”.

Honestly at this point the most likely cause of death is an aneurysm or impetus viscus with all the clenching he does.


I don’t know. Ebola has an excuse.


Apparently it didn’t fly. His ex got full custody. Watching Jones sob about that was one of the most cathartic things I’ve seen this year.


It was just for the photo op. He’d cheerfully slit his children’s throats if he thought it would net him a few dollars.


Flavor Aid is not only the lesser known product, it also doesn’t roll off the tongue like ‘Koolaid’ does.

Besides, Americans are known for bastardizing pretty much everything.