Alibaba's censorship for sex toys is AMAZE-BALLS


#1

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2017/10/06/gross-lots-of-anal-invaders.html


#2

That strange piece of rubber bamboo is giving me the finger. Still offended!


#3

Because nobody knows what genitals look like, and we can’t let them find out! What a bunch off bell-ends.


#4

Amazing!

… Well…

I guess I need to do some browsing of Bad Dragon now.


#5


#6

I can attest that ginger makes a hardcore sex toy.


#7

Surely you mean AMAZE-BALL-LESS?


#8

What are they? I can’t even tell.


#9

Protip: do not peel first.


#10

Who is this “ginger”?


#11

:no_entry_sign:
The emoji is called “no_entry_sign”.


#12

A lot of Asian porn uses this sort of homeopathic censorship. Often it’s literally just a thin black line, like a minus sign, placed across the naughtiest bits. Or a Cops- style pixelation effect so subtle that you can still see individual veins.

I’ve wondered before if it’s to skirt a legal requirement, or whether it’s a strange form of politeness, like saying “excuse me” after you burp and blow it in someone’s face.


#13

Or maybe all the products really do have little “no entry” stickers on them, like a weird fetish thing?


#14

Actually, proper figging definitely calls for peeled ginger.


#15

In Japan, I believe it’s done in order to comply with laws prohibiting “unobstructed view of genitals.” So you start out with bona-fide pixelling and bars and then you keep pushing the envelope for 30 years.


#16

Besides, who could fit that whole thing in their urethra unshaped?


#17

Diligently following your stretching regimen is a vital part of any advanced urethra play.


#18

And IIRC porn is entirely illegal in China. So these sex toys would be censored to protect for that.


In other news. Ali Baba is probably the last place I’d buy sex toys. That shits going in your holes. And the fake item filled, no guaranteed its not poisoned retailer is the last place anyone should look for things that are going to have intimate contact with your mucus membranes.


#19

Reminds me of that, “I think you can see her kidneys” line from Clerks.


#20

With how minimal the pixelation can get and how heavy a lot of American airbrushing can get it is entirely plausible that the censored version is closer to reality.