Added it. Thanks!
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It’s the Karen version of playing dead, I guess?
Honestly, the more I think about this the more pissed off I am at that guy Tony. She’s the ones causing a big scene. Why don’t you help her off the street and into the apartment, which she was not being prevented from entering despite what some commenters have written here? No, instead shush along a civilian who has been insulted as if he’s causing the disturbance.
She could’ve deescalated the situation at any possible moment and chose not to.
ETA: fixed a typo now memorialized in a reply, embarrassing…
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Yeah, I clocked that as well; certain folks are so busy tripping over themselves in their rush to defend the woman in question, that they seem to be seeing actions the posted footage does not show.
The man in question absolutely shouldn’t have followed her home (for various valid reasons) but nobody was stopping her from taking her crying ass inside and locking her door.
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That was her second mistake. “You know what I am sorry. I apologize for losing it on you. Have a nice day.” and then walk inside. Nope instead she doubles down on her racism and assholery and then drops a victim card to boot.
But given her initial actions, she clearly is not capable of making rational, good, adult decisions…for whatever reason(s).
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She’s a white woman screaming to anyone who will listen that a black man is attacking her.
That is literally putting his life at risk.
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How is it that white knights like this can’t seem to grasp a simple concept…It isn’t being called out for shitty behavior that ruins someone’s life…it’s the shitty behavior that does it!!!
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I’m debating with myself about even commenting on this, and when I do that it’s almost always a mistake to comment, but here I go anyhow.
I’m watching the extended video on Instagram, and at 10:27-ish minutes in he says, “You’re not going to be on Instagram. I’m not going to ruin your life. That’s not my goal here.”
Hmmm.
Yes, her behavior is abhorrent, her non-stop screaming was nerve wracking, her screams that he was attacking her were absurd, road rage is dangerous for everyone involved, she owes him an apology at the very least, and I’m also glad that cops didn’t show up to make things worse.
I have 4 more minutes to go in the video, so I’m not sure what’s going to happen next, but…
He did put it on Instagram and it may ruin her life. If that wasn’t his goal… why did he do it?
On the one hand, I can see her meltdown as the realization that she was called on her uncivilized behavior and that with filmed proof of said behavior her life could be utterly fucked. If she pays any attention to the news, she might have noticed how that plays out these days – white privilege is no longer the shield it once was. She realizes she has utterly fucked up, and melts down. Having not yet been in a position where I’ve torpedoed my future, I can’t say how I would react having done so.
I’m thankful people were there to back him up, and to try to calm her down. And once again, thankful the cops weren’t involved.
But to me, personally, his decision to post this after telling her he wouldn’t, and not obscuring the prime way for her to be identified in his video – her license plate – comes across as unnecessarily vindictive and an attempt to ruin her life.
I don’t know. I have a lot of my own baggage and biases to consider from being on this stupid planet for 52 years. Maybe I’m off base. But posting the video just feels wrong to me. Like an appeal for mob justice.
Agreed.
I don’t feel that his confronting her was taking it too far. I feel like posting it online was. But not my shoes, not my journey.
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Asking for an apology and to be treated as a person is wrong?
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oh not that part. the chasing her down part. And I am fairly certain I explicitly stated this in the thread.
No one is going to kill her for her race. The lady with the dog in the park got a whole puff piece that tried to put her in a good light in the NYT after threatening a man with the police for literally asking her to abide by the rules of the park.
Her life is NOT going to be ruined. In a week, she’ll apologize and everyone will forget her and she’ll go on to the rest of her life, after she attacked this man, yelled a racial epithet at him, flipped him off, and brake checked him. She was the aggressor here. She’s not victim. At all.
This is bringing this form of racism out into the light. There is a long history of white women claiming black men raped them, made a pass at them, looked at them funny, etc and those men being killed. This is what happened to Emmett Till. He was 15 years old, and was beaten, shot, and dumped in a river because a white woman said he whistled at her.
At some point, we have to stop demanding Black people have to rise above such acts that can get them killed. We ask them to forgive and forgive, and to keep forgiving, and far too many of us seem entirely unwilling to change the least things about our systems to give them a break from this endless hell of institutional racism.
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Indeed. Seems like we’re up to more than one a day now of these racist shits getting caught on camera.
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That’s what pisses me off when dumbasses say things like “protesting accomplishes nothing”, “being violent or loud, or doing anything a white person in power doesn’t like is counterproductive.”
Society is always asking minorities to sacrifice themselves rather than be recognized as people. And it’s sickening.
“Don’t make a ruckus everyone will think you’re inappropriate. Just quietly endure being killed for your race. That’s the way to gain respect.”
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We’re starting to move away from the idea of racism as a personal animosity perpetuated by bigoted, ignorant southerners who drive large trucks with truck nutz and confederate flags. But we’re (meaning as a society, not us as individuals) still struggling to understand just how systemic racism functions, especially how white privilege functions, and how people like this woman actively use it to their advantage…
Exactly!
And holding white people to account for their actions is in no way dehumanizing them! Instead, it’s very much granting them their full humanity, which includes the ability to act shitty! This is not going to ruin her life. People will get over this and she’ll be fine, because our society is literally built to cater to her and her needs!
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The thing is, people lose their temper. It happens to most of us. But losing one’s temper is losing self-control, not undergoing a personality transformation. It’s not like everyone is keeping a lid on using bigoted slurs. Many of us aren’t going to use them no matter how mad we are, not because we can’t lose control, but because we loathe them and don’t want to use them. So if someone is tempted to use them to hurt someone because they’ve lost their temper, it’s not about rage, it’s about them being okay with using bigoted slurs.
No, anyone doing that is missing the point. Road rage is bad, but her uncivilized behavior shouldn’t be the issue. Her willingness to weaponize race is the issue. And that’s the whole point. POC deal with having racism weaponized against them every day. We all deal with shitty behavior and we all behave shitily at times to varying extents. What we don’t all deal with is having racism used as a force multiplier against us, but POC deal with all their lives.
I really want people to understand this point. The systemic racism isn’t the meltdown, it’s the persecution complex over being called out on racist behavior.
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Could be that what she did was uncalled for and inexcusable.
Also, perhaps weaponizing the internet in this way could be avoided, or at least done more thoughtfully. Was it necessary to reveal her license plate? No. Viral, cultural shaming is more than enough these days.
And both of this points can be simultaneously true.
The difference is that she’ll be uncomfortably shamed for a couple of weeks. HER BEHAVIOR CAN GET HIM KILLED.
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I’m a Black Lives Matter supporter but I don’t like this at all.
What I see here is a woman losing it because she’s terrified of her life being ruined and being shamed on the Internet, which is what has now happened. When the man says, “What are you afraid of?”, this is it. Notice how she tries to cover her face and license plate.
The guy claims she drove badly, flipped him off, and called him the N-word. If she did, that’s obviously not OK, but this isn’t evidence of that. This guy claims she did those things, but then he followed her to her apartment, called her “Karen,” and recorded her having a meltdown to publicly shame her on the internet. Flipping people off is bad but shouldn’t result in public shaming. Also, if she called him the N-word, why isn’t that his main complaint? That seems far worse than giving someone the finger, but he focuses on her flipping him off, and the N-word allegation drops out of the story.
I think this post should be taken down.
I’m not defending her actions.
You can’t say that with certainty, there is no quantifying what a viral internet shaming will produce and for how long. Therefor it can become disproportionate justice.
He has video this, as well as eye witness support.
No white woman has been killed by it. Again, the woman from the dog park a few weeks back had a fucking NYT piece written about her from sympathetic light. 
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Perhaps.
But also consider this. When you’ve tried the polite route, the quiet route, and the rationalization route (“It’s just a few bad apples” / “I can just forget this and move on”) and nothing changes, when, then, do you give yourself permission to expose those that attack you with bigotry, by any means necessary?
I won’t even pretend to be able to imagine what living with this level of bigotry and hatred is like day in and day out, but if someone decides to be a bigot, I have no issue with having that exposed. As far as I’m concerned, it’s the responsibility of the bigot to atone for their choices, not the responsibility of the victim to keep the response proportional.
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