A Beard has fallen.
Nothing of its like had come before; nothing of its like shall come again.
12 Likes
(Quirky slams the console, hurls the Omni-Pay™ at the distressing array of lights blinking red.)
My mammal friend!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
5 Likes
So is it just a hat shop this week?
1 Like
As an aside, I was roaming around and came across this building - is this where you went to get your Galaxy Suit? I’ve been admiring it and thinking about upgrading.
8 Likes
I guess some shaves are too close.
5 Likes
Except for 10pm-4am Unizone Standard Time; that’s Isaac Mizrahi LIVE!
“The Hat Shop is a planet, darling … the Hat Shop is such a planet.”
“There was Uranus and there was Saturn and there was the one with the rings on it … alright here look, this is key lime.”
“The Hat Shop is what? The Hat Shop is a natural satellite? What’s that mean? Is that what Unibingoogle said? No, I don’t like that at all.”
1 Like
Phew, I was hoping I wouldn’t end up worse off. Now that that’s resolved, time to get me a drink!
Er, wait, what?!
2 Likes
And where to rest my bones, an easy week when it came to missions for the Awesomating OVerthruster, but the weariest of all losing duck and innumerable pilots. I don’t even know where to go to drink down this pain…I don’t think they’ll let me darken the stoop of the hatshop for long, Ella is mum, Unizone is still Unizoning…it may be time to set our sights on distant stars and jump into a hibernation pod…
Browf: Bravo, good sir. If we had a bar to frequent, I’d propose a toast.
3 Likes
Round 7 - Money Talks
Ella: The shipping detail from the Cloud City of Fluffington reported heavy armament around the bit mining facilities and our reconnaissance from the Unizone factory obtained this image...
The briefing screen flickers to life…
Kangot: A giant penny?
Pete: What’s a penny?
Duck snorts, stomps and leaps from his chair.
Duck: That’s the bastard! Showed up out of nowhere and blasted the planet to crap. Good thing I keep The Pond up to spec, saw action in the last war. Fast ship. Got out of there with just a few dings.
Ella: The giant penny is a warship. We think it is also a host body. This artificial intelligence has massive processing power behind it and we believe it is trying to consolidate that distributed power into a single ship. I recommend trying to communicate with the A.I. so that we can determine a motivation.
A deep croaking chuckle rises from the back of the room.
Don Mondo: I recommend destroying it. Immediately.
Pete’s Scrapyard
Open for repairs. Still accepting currency.
b1 - Hull Repairs (2 HP)
b120 - Complete Overhaul (Full HP / +10 Max HP / +2 SH)
Ella’s Shipping Depot
b20 - Glopper Gun (2 FP)
b60 - Gatling Cannon (8 FP)
b40 - Hull Plating (4 SH)
b20 - Scan Scrambler (2 ST)
b20 - Machine That Goes Bing (2 EN)
Missions
Mission 1 - Cloud Busters
Destroy the cloud mining facilities in Fluffington.
Mission Cost: b20
Restrictions: This mission is open to any ship.
Rewards if Successful: b2000
Risks: 3x Turbo Cannons (20-60 Damage based on SH, FP & EN. You have 10-30% chance to dodge each one based on LK & ST.
Mission 2 - Follow the Money
Track and monitor the Giant Penny as it rolls across Charybdis.
Mission Cost: b20
Restrictions: This mission is open to any ship.
Rewards if Successful: b2000
Risks: You have 10-20% chance of being detected based on LK & ST. Detection by Giant Penny will result in 80-120 Damage based on SH & EN.
Mission 3 - Spare Change
The Giant Penny has a fleet of drone cubes and scouts sweeping across Charybdis. Wipe out as many as you choose.
Mission Cost: b50
Restrictions: This mission is open to any ship.
Rewards if Successful: b200 per drone.
Risks: Each Unizone Shipping Drone will do 10-20 Damage based on SH, FP & EN. You have a chance to dodge their return fire based on LK & ST. The drones have a small chance of escaping you and an equally small chance of a critical hit for double damage.
Mission 4 - Change of Scenery
The mail must go through… And if you’re delivering it, you can go lay low on Benemede for a while.
Mission Cost: b10
Restrictions: This mission is open to any ship.
Rewards if Successful: b20
Risks: 1 x Asteroids (3-7 HP based on SH & EN)
We’re meant to attempt communication without being detected?
If we are detected, and aren’t killed, do we still get paid?
@gwwar - wanna swap 4 more FP for ST?
Why, of course! This does of course reveal the true color of my ship which is a neon safety yellow… The solution must be to add more guns right?
give @danneel 4ST for 4FP
2 Likes
[Lazlo boggles at the display inside the Strat-o-sphere 400, watching the feed from Fluffington]
“My grandlobster always said: ‘Keep yer wits about ya, Lazlo - a bad penny always turns up.’ Never knew just how right she was until today.”
Retconned.
1 Like
Timely. We lost seven ships this week.
8 Likes
What is considered “Successful” for Mission1 and Mission 2?
Mission1 says “destroy mining facilities” – how difficult is this? We have stats on the damage they can inflict upon us; but is there any estimate of the damage we can inflict upon them/it? If everybody takes Mission 1 and destroys the facility, is the b2000 (?!?) split amongst all, or does each get b2000?
Mission 2 - “track and monitor” – success is simply not being detected? and you get b2000 in return for that? Only a 1/10 or 1/5 chance of getting damaged, compared to a 7-9/10 chance of being damaged in Mission 1 ???
Mission 1 - Payout is for each ship who participates in the effort. Not split.
Mission 2 - Yup.
Well, I wouldn’t say we lost them, I’m pretty sure we know exactly where they are: scattered into many tiny bits
4 Likes
Given the risk profile, it’s not clear to me at the moment why destroying the cloud mining facilities would be a worthy objective. The implication is that the giant penny may otherwise make use of those resources to become more dangerous than it already is. Supposition A) is additional information missing? Supposition B) perhaps certain mission thresholds were not met resulting in a lack of specific information? Supposition C) Am I over thinking this?
4 Likes
