Capitol hill rioter Jacob Chansley to plead guitly, would like to no longer be called "Qanon Shaman"

[smut_clyde]

@beschizza

he would like to no longer be referred to as the Qanon Shaman

I would like to no longer be referred to as “That dickweed Smut”, but my preferences don’t seem to matter much.

[kmoser]

Sham-Manon

[bobtato]

@Brainspore

He had a fondness for Trump that was not unlike a first love a man may have for a girl

I always wondered what my stomach lining looked like

[FSogol]

Translation: he cried a little and wants a do-over with hopes that everyone forgets his actions.

[PurpleFlower]

@Brainspore

Liberals who abandon nuance, context and compassion have a tendency to just turn into assholes who do more harm than good for the cause or even switching sides entirely. Look at Bill Maher or Glenn Greenwald.

Put me on TV, I’ll do it. I’m autistic, I don’t really do nuance, context, or compassion real well anyway.

[jaded]

@anon48584343

"The Psychic Sasquatch and Their Interdimensional Connection is the product of 55 years of accumulated knowledge based on ongoing encounters with the psychic Sasquatch as experienced by author/researcher Kewaunee Lapseritis, BA, MS, MH, a recognized world authority. "

On a lark I followed the link, and was a bit taken aback that all the reviews of this book were totally straight looking, and they all seem to buy into the idea that telepathic interdimensional hairy ape-man-bear-pigs shyly hide in the Pacific Northwest woods. There are a few that say the author “strains credulity”, but that’s it.

I suppose there’s little chance that, given its title, a sane reader would spend valuable money on this book and give it an honest review, so I guess it’s not too surprising.

[dreamofthedarkstar]

@deltaecho

Sooner than that. One minute after his punishment/probationary period is over, he will renounce all his previous renunciations “his lawyer made him say” and be back to his old ways, on the QAnon / Big Lie / Stop the Steal / Mike Flynn / Kraken circuit. None of these old dogs can learn new tricks, unless it’s court-ordered.

Not if he figures out a way to market the Qanon Shaman image into a celebrity money-maker which isn’t dependent on treason. If he can turn that celebrity into B-grade commercials and some sit-com guest star slots, he’ll stop worrying about “the steal”. At least until demand for those commercial and guest-star appearances dries up.

[jaded]

@dreamofthedarkstar

If he can turn that celebrity into B-grade commercials and some sit-com guest star slots, he’ll stop worrying about “the steal”. At least until demand for those commercial and guest-star appearances dries up.

So I’m trying to think about what kinds of shows might have him on.

• A Japanese game show called something like “Shit On His Face”, where contestants get the chance to drop a deuce on the face of someone who desperately deserves it
• A remake of “Back to the Future”, where his character is riding shotgun with Biff when his open-top vehicle gets buried beneath a manure pile; but he keeps screwing up his lines so they have to reshoot the scene 20 times
• A Public Service Announcement commercial where he advocates for “flushable wipes” and then they let the @neosrd guy from Twitter dump a bucket of wipes cleared from the filters over his head, and shout “no, these are not flushable!”
• “Proud Bois Aren’t The New Black”, a new HBO reality show where he goes to prison and he and his namesake pals discover they are less than popular
• Guest appearances on Fox segments, where he has to suck on Tucker Carlson’s foul breath for six hour stretches

[dreamofthedarkstar]

Sadly, that last one is actually quite likely.

[DonatellaNobody]

@jaded

A Japanese game show called something like “Shit On His Face”, where contestants get the chance to drop a deuce on the face of someone who desperately deserves it

This is almost literally what I had in mind:

Weird flashing lights, Japanese techno music. Women in costumes only Matt Gaetz could love are dancing a donkey around in tight circles while pouring sake into its feedbag. The donkey stumbles drunkenly and dizzily for a bit. The music stops. A trapdoor opens behind the donkey, which takes the most massive foul smelling unhealthiest dump right down the chute.

“Center square, Q Anon Shaman!”

“But… It’s not even organic!”

This shit writes itself.

[jaded]

I’d watch that for a dollar!

[FGD135]

He could sell the comforters that go with the pillows.

[oldstevo]

That comparison is a bit unfair on the bowel movements, isn’t it?