Elephant vs. Goose


#1

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2018/11/14/elephant-vs-goose.html


#2

Canada geese are known as Cobra Chickens in Winnipeg (and other parts of Canada), and for very good reason. They’re the drunk asshole who picks bar fights just because you stepped in their sister’s turd slime. And they end up having a black belt in karate and also hiss. THEY HISS!


#3

Poor goose.


#4

Serves 10 - 12 humans or one hungry elephant.


#5

What a rude elephant.


#6

Roast Elephant Recipe… Serves 50-100 humans, or one disinterested goose.


#7

Boo


#8

Urban hunting?


#9


#10

Team Elephant here. i’ll bet that elephant is saying, “GOD, i fuckin’ HATE that goose!”


#11

Yep, I use to live by a park back in Kansas and we had loads of them throughout the year (even winter) and if you tried to drive past them while they’re deciding whether to cross the road or not they wouldn’t budge if you honked your horn or revved your engine. They’d just give you the stink eye with the implication that if you got out of your car they’d gang up on you and your car. :slight_smile:


#12

The goose had it comin’. Fuck that goose.


#13

See also:


#14

Don’t get me started about the masses of geese near Oak Park on the banks of the Little Arkansas in Wichita in the winter. Currently, the geese seem to be settling down more in Kansas, even in the summer. I’d been out walking on the far west side near my mom’s house, and made a comment about all the crap on the sidewalks, thinking it was people not picking up after their pugs and chihuahuas, until she told me it was the by-product of the geese.


#15

At least its not a Swan… figgin bastards.


#16

Larsen said his colleagues at work really enjoy a pulled-goose sandwich that he prepares in a slow cooker at the office.

image


#17

That pugilistic pachyderm is a douchecanoe.


#18

I’m with you on this one. Geese are frickin’ mean with an attitude and they crap everywhere.


#19

That goose is such an arsehole that it keeps on doing it. And the elephant remembers (unlike some!)


#20

What is a mage stick? A wand? (I assume the missing k and missing word space were the real typos here.)