Family gets food poisoning from feast to celebrate surviving food poisoning


Originally published at:


“Jesus H. Me! You’re supposed to properly COOK it first!”


Damn you, irony!

/shakes fist at irony, sprains arm


I guess now they’re going to have a feast to celebrate their recovery from a bout of food poisoning from a feast to celebrate their recovery from a bout of food poisoning.


What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.


Unless one or more of them don’t recover.

(Then they’ll have a feast to mourn the passing of those poisoned at the feast celebrating their recovery from the poisoning from the feast…)


How the hell is it a “Sacrifice” if you eat what you killed for dinner? Where’s the sacrifice in that?
I think God was just pissed they ate his food.



It’s food poisoning all the way down!

var poisoned = false ;

setInterval( loop, 1000 ) ;

function loop() {
  poisoned = poisoned ? recover() : feast() ;

function feast() {
  console.log( 'Yum!' ) ;
  return true ;

function recover() {
  var stillPoisoned = Math.random() < 0.25 ;
  console.log( stillPoisoned ? 'Groan' : 'Huzzah! Now we feast!' ) ;
  return stillPoisoned ;


Perhaps this is a sign to let someone else do the cooking this time.



Apparently not.


That which does not kill you should make you more cautious.

Food poison me once, shame on you. Food poison me twice, shame on me.


Four people remain in intensive care in the northern Turkish province of Tekirdag,

Do they have lax food handling and inspection practices there?


s/makes you stronger/only prolongs the inevitable/


No, no, NO! It’s ‘Food poison me twice, you can’t get fooled again.’


Another “Interpret message from God” FAIL. Quite obviously they were all supposed to die of food poisoning in the first place. You know, as part of GODSPLAN.

Having been tempted by Satan to survive, they find God repeating his message to them.


Lol! Litteraly


Ms Erdal said in the future she would be more careful about preserving food, and added the family had become more fussy about what they ate after the two bouts of illness.

No kidding. Every time I’ve been food poisoned (thrice so far, no hospitalizations, and none of the food prepared by me :octopus: ), I’ve added a new layer to my food pickiness.