Fl Gov Rick Scott's consultant is not humping a mannequin with an ice penis


#1

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2017/11/28/political-consultant-swears-fl.html


#2

nope. not what it seems at all…it is EXACTLY what it seems.


#3

Of course the ice is really to keep him from humping it with his own penis.


#4

The post headline is: “Consultant swears Fl Gov Rick Scott is not humping a mannequin with an ice penis”

But that is clearly not Rick Scott in the photo.

This is Rick Scott:

image

Funny though.


#5

Sorry, I botched that and thought I fixed it. Thought the edit posted but forgot to select a box in discourse. Hoping to catch it everywhere.


#6

Oh I see, thanks!

I also just love any opportunity to display that horrifying photo of Rick Scott.


#7

HERZOG FTW! “I’ve dwelled among the humans. Their entire culture is built around their penises. It’s funny to say they are small, it’s funny to say they are big. I’ve been at parties where humans have held bottles, pencils and thermoses in front of themselves and called out, ‘Hey, look at me! I’m Mr. So-And-So Dick! I’ve got such-and-such for a penis!’ I never saw it fail to get a laugh.”


#8

"Hey look at me, I’m Mr. Ice Dick! I’ve got ice for a penis!
“I never saw it fail to get a laugh.”


#9

Ack!
That thing is terrifying! What is it?


#10

It’d be so much better if it was Rick Scott.


#11

That was our ice luge. It melted, so I was picking it up and throwing it over the fence there.

Sir, were you humping the mannequin with your ice penis or were you carelessly throwing a large block of ice onto a public sidewalk where one could easily slip on it and fall into the Mississippi River?


#12

He says he has three daughters and a young son and clarifies that he does not hump mannequins.

Oh, Florida, you just keep on giving.


#13

Wow, seriously? Swine indeed.


#14

I dunno, it doesn’t look like an ice penis. It looks like a partly melted block of ice. The mannequins hips are facing the wrong way for entry. He doesn’t have wild eyes or his tongue wagging out, nor throwing devil horns. (That’s how it looks during, sex, right?) Block of ice isn’t even up against the groin.

I dunno, I think this really is a fairly reasonable explanation. If that is the worse they have on some one, seems rather tame.


#15

an adult mannequin!? I don’t believe it!


#16

I’d believe the mannequin before I’d believe Cooper.


#17

Uh-uh. Bat_BoyThat’s Bat Boy.


#18

Christ, I don’t want to see what he’s humping.


#19

Nope. If you look at where the ice is compared to the mannequin, it is waaay too close for the guy to just be throwing it over the fence. And even if that doesn’t clinch it, who throws ice at the mannequin to get it over said fence?

Or like, steps up to the mannequin, angles the ice juuuust so, then, and only then, chucks it over?

I call ice penis mannequin humping.


#20

Wtf is this? Talk about a nothingburger.