Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2018/10/08/how-to-make-your-own-black-w.html
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The whole “Alkaline/Acid” food/drink “health” products are a special kind of woo and takes a special kind of stupid to think the digestion of foods or drink is some how going to affect your blood, when your digestive system literally uses hydrocloric acid.
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For all those hyping how good for you alkaline water is, wasn’t that a problem for pioneers attempting to cross stretches of the US Southwest desert – the only water sources were heavily alkaline, which was no good to drink? Hence all those images of cattle skeletons next to poisonous water sources.
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Mississippi moon, won’t you keep on shining on me?
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“Black water”? Really? " Blackwater is what you call water contaminated with sewage, which likely contains pathogens. Seems like a bad name for a water product.
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Yea why would both vinegar and this black water be good for you? Maybe the whole idea is to reach a middle ground, like ph7?
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For all we know it could be this stuff, rendered scentless:
Though maybe if you can get it past your nose, and if some influencer is recommending it…
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This is the first time I have heard of the much-hyped black water. Is the hype ineffective? Or am I immune?
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Not to mention the good old PMC.
“That is not water!”
“Black Blood of the Earth.”
“…You mean oil?”
“I mean Black Blood of the Earth!”
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“it tastes like water, but bitter” – so, NOT like water at all, then? 
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And no ready source of caffeine like other black drinks (Strike five.)
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According to Self, “neither fulvic acid or humic acid are required in humans.”
Plenty of things that are not required in humans are nonetheless widely self-administered, such as [YOUR INTOXICANT OF CHOICE].
Update: on reflection, perhaps your intoxicant of choice is required in humans. (Endorphins, I’m thinking of you.) Alternately, it wasn’t required until you got hooked, but it sure as hell feels required now.
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That’s the first thing that came into my mind when i read the article.
But then, we have fecal transplants, so there is that. 
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I finally get my teeth white through the miracle of charcoal and now you want me to drink black water!
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You don’t need a degree in Chemistry to note that there’s a distinct lack of coherent thought going into this woo-filled marketing hype.
However, if you insist on drinking something with a lot of fulvic and humic Acids in it, may I suggest a more palatable solution:
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Mix it with this stuff and it’ll all cancel out.
Oh wait, this stuff is alkaline too, but it’ll cancel out anyway.
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