Originally published at: http://boingboing.net/2016/07/20/man-accused-of-decapitating-ne.html
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“The guy just wouldn’t leave me alone.”
So I killed & buried him in my backyard. The ironic logic is astounding.
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Maine-iac.
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“nearly decapitating”
I really can’t stand people who half-ass a job.
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I’ll bet this Flint guy just wouldn’t leave His. Fucking. Driveway!
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Yeah I would have his head for that type of shoddy work.
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Near decapitation is worse!!!
Case in point: Nearly Headless Nick, from the Harry Potter books!
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One of my jobs is as an on-site apartment manager and while most of my tenants are normal enough I have a couple who give me a vibe that results in me never entering their apartment alone for maintenance or any other reason and never engaging with them unless I’m armed* and alert.
/*generally I use a blackthorne shillelagh as it tends to not make people aggressive to see a middle aged man with a cane. If anything it can work the opposite way “Oh, I don’t want to upset the old guy who need a cane.” but it’s still a big ass club if it needs to be.
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…found the body of Flint under a pile of rotting dear carcasses.
My God! He got the family members too?
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When I lived in San Diego County, a couple of buddies and I formed a band. Tom, the lead guitarist, grew up three doors down from my house, and we both got electric guitars the same Christmas when we were kids, so once we thought we were good enough, we recruited another buddy Justin to be bassist and singer since he’d been writing lyrics in a Mead spiral notebook since eighth grade and was the only one willing to sing. Drummers were tough to come by, so initially I played rhythm guitar and we played along to a Roland TR-505 drum machine. It sucked, so eventually I just bought a $299 drumkit from the last Sears catalog and taught myself how to play them. But we always missed having a rhythm guitarist who could play well with Tom.
Anyway, one day when we were planning to jam in my girlfriend’s mother’s garage, Justin calls all excited 'cause he met this drummer dude named Ramon who was supposed to be real good, and seemed like a cool guy. So he brings Ramon over and we jam for a couple hours and it’s a pretty good time. I’d never had occasion to play guitar along to real live drumming before, and it was great. I think we had Ramon come over one other time for a jam, then he kinda disappeared.
So then, maybe six months later, Justin calls up all excited for another reason. “Duuuude! Guess what! Remember that guy Ramon?”
“No. Who’s he?”
“That drummer guy who jammed with us in the garage that time!”
“Oh, yeah. What’s he up to?”
“He just got arrested for murdering his girlfriend and cutting her up into little bits and stashing the pieces in the carport of his apartment!”
“Holy shit.”
“Yeah… I mean, can you believe it? He was a hell of a good drummer too.”
“I guess you never can tell.”
For a couple years I thought Justin was pulling my leg. But nope: that was Ramon all right.
I admit you reminded me of him because he was an apartment manager too.
You never can tell. 
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That reminds me that there is this guy I casual knew who I meet from time to time at KMFDM concerts. Last time I saw him he was with this quiet guy who had these funky looking contacts. That was like 3 years ago. Last time I saw him I asked, “Hey where is that guy you brought last time?”
“Oh him? He was a guy from work. He, uh, is in jail for attempted murder.”
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Back in my long lost early twenties, I gave a ride to a concert to a friend of a friend of mine, and en route we got pulled over by the highway patrol. As the trooper was approaching my van (of course with tie-dyed curtains), the new guy nervously said. “I hope that attempted murder charge won’t pop up”.
Thank goodness it didn’t.
I’m a person who really works at being calm and chill, but yeah an apartment manager in someplace like my units could pretty easily end you and get away with it.
You couldn’t do some Motel Hell bullshit, but you could do it once for sure unless you were an idiot.
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Once upon a time i was roomates with a couple who were also part time club promoters for EDM and darkrave stuff. They break up badly & i stay friends with the lady we all move out and I fall out of touch with the dude completely. Fast forward oh say 6 years or so and while getting ready for work one morning in January i hear a news story about “the first murder of the new year” and hear my old roomates name…
Theres lots of people in the world right? Cant be him right? Nope. Its him. He axe murdered a homeless man that was crashing in his apartment. Because while we all grew up and out of the raves and afterparties … he found herion. He pled guilty and got a deal becauae he was also involved in an international drug smuggling ring…
So because he dealt and pled guilty… hes out. 7 years later.
Reminded me cuz he also liked to wear those funny contacts.
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As long as we’re we’re telling creepy person stories:
I used to work for the same hospital as this guy who was a janitor there. He was a young guy, fresh out of high school. We’d nod to each other in the hallway and never said much to each other. One day I run into him at the bookstore and I say hi to be polite. He just unloads a ton of TMI on me about his personal life, like we’d been friends forever. I instantly get a creeped out weird-ass vibe from him and excuse myself.
Two days later I come into work in the morning and my coworker asks if I read the paper. “Who died?” (Occupational hazard when you work at the hospital is that obituaries get more interesting.)
“Check the crime section.”
There he was. Arrested for looking up child porn at the public library using their computers. The report went into some detail about it, which I’ll spare you, but we’re talking some pretty extreme stuff. Naturally the story moved quick, but unlike so many stories where the refrain is, “I never thought he was capable of something like this.” The consensus among people who knew him better than me was, “Yup. Sounds exactly like the kind of thing you’d expect to find out about him.”
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These stories just remind me that deep, deep darkness is never far away. If it’s not actually right there inside of you, it’s definitely there in someone you know. And it’s probably only a matter of time before that darkness shows itself.
Yeesh. That sounds much creepier than I intended. Somehow, I actually take a certain degree of comfort in it. The sooner we all recognize the basic humanity of our inhumanity, the better-prepared we’ll be to deal with it, and hopefully eventually diminish it.
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The creepiest person I’ve ever known personally was this guy named Richard. I can’t remember his last name so there is no way I can look up to see what ever happened to him.
I lived in the dorm as a freshman at a JUCO. I have to hand it to who ever paired up the people for the rooms, because me and my room mate were certainly birds of a feather. And Lucian and Richard were two odd ducks. Lucian I couldn’t pin down. Not sure if he was a super smart dorky guy, or just a poor dorky guy? I saw his father a few times and he now reminds me of what Crumb.
Anyway, Richard was just scary weird. He had the crazy eyes. He did weird things that were partly just rumors and partly real. My GF went to HS with him and said he had a list of who he wouldn’t kill (shorter that way.) For what ever reason he liked me. Maybe because I never picked on him. Maybe because I had attained the rank of likable nerd. I dunno. I remember one time coming into the dorm with a huge thing of laundry and he had a bunch of books and he stopped what he was doing, put them down, and let me in. Just went out of his way to the point it was odd.
Anyway - hopefully he worked out what ever and is well adjust with kids of his own somewhere.
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i worked at a ranch resort in estes park, colorado for about a year and a half. one of the sous chefs was a tall guy about 60 years old named dan who had circulation problems that gave his nose, lips, and ears a slight blue cast that got more blue when he was drinking. he was a very old school kind of guy who was pretty domineering to everyone in the kitchen except for the executive chefs, treated the waitresses like personal servants, regarded housekeepers like me as unwanted intruders in the kitchen even though that was where the janitor’s closet was in the restaurant and lounge area, and was just a general all around asshole.
at the first christmas party the management gave a free open bar after the gift exchange and so he was knocking back the drinks turning bluer and bluer. when the song “all my exes live in texas” came up one of the waitresses, around 40-45, who had also been knocking them back, started whooping and hollering and dancing by herself. the sight of her staggering around totally drunk was such a turn-on for dan that i saw him drool a little, seriously he was drooling. he immediately finished his drink and started dancing with her. when the lodge management started handing out room keys to employees who had been drinking too much to drive dan and the waitress headed off together. after that night they became an item and they moved in together in dan’s house down in estes. around 4 months later she was hopped up on diet pills and hydrocodone tablets while dan was boozing it up which led to her and dan getting into a huge argument. apparently he beat the crap out of her and when she crawled out of the house and started trying to get someone to call the police or help her he got out a shotgun and shot her in the back while she was on the ground. then he realized what he had done and dragged into his car. from the news reports about his statement he was going to try to take her to the emergency room and then realized she was dead so then he went back into the house, reloaded the shotgun, sat down in the driver’s seat and shot himself in the chest. oddly enough, he survived, recovered, and went on trial. he was sentenced to life in prison. at this point, 25 years down the road, i’m sure he must have died in prison.
anyway, because of his really hideous personality, i must say i wasn’t terribly surprised that he killed someone. and i had sat at the lodge bar on more than one occasion when he was there and talked to him. good times.
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“Nearly decapitated”?
Disgusting. A real Mainer would’ve finished what he started. They should lock the guy up just on principle, but maybe he gets points because (after all) it was over a six-pack.
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I would think that it would have been easier to dig a suitably deep hole if he had buried the body with a shovel instead…
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