Originally published at: Police: "no reports" of JD Vance's imaginary pet bar-be-ques - Boing Boing
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Next on the list of racist tropes, cannibalism…
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“Twenty-seven times as many reports of JD Vance breaking into homes to have sex with furniture as pet barbecues”
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JD has switched to sex with donuts
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JD Vance has ants in his pants.
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Yes, Americans in rural areas would never (checks notes) hunt ducks and geese.
Honestly surprised they weren’t claiming Haitians were sacrificing their neighbor’s pets as part of “Voodoo” rituals. That’s the quality of racism we had back in the '80s, with claims of eating the neighbor’s pets confined to immigrants from East Asia. I swear, the racists aren’t even bothering to make the effort to come up with distinct racist tropes these days. Though perhaps it also shows how far removed we are from the Satanic panic now - and, I suppose, '80s Voodoo movies, so perhaps they weren’t even aware of those particular racist tropes.
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Huh, it’s like modern blood libel stories; but with a different “outsider” group.
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Oh, I’m sure the arseholes can manage to shoehorn the Jews in to this somehow.
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There is this weird quasi religious group that’s skipping the kidnapping of pets part, but is cooking every pet, as well as all humans, globally, by encouraging the unfettered use of fossil fuels. This is despite the vast consensus of the scientific community telling them it’s a horrible idea. When challenged on it, they either claim the Lord will retcon the situation, or that reality is a Chinese hoax.
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Alexandra Erin on Bluesky:
BREAKING: Notorious couch-fucker wildly misunderstands anecdote about “eating pussy”
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only if it involves him flying and the donut rolling!
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If they raise the temperature slowly enough, and no one will notice.
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It’s just good ol’ racism. No one is eating pets. Pets go missing all the time, hit by cars, killed by coyotes or other animals, or picked up and kept by people. (keep your pets indoors). And on occasion a methead or fucked up kid will kill a cat, and they aren’t Haitian immigrants.
I’ve seen one pic of some guy with a dead goose, and big ol’ yawn here. 1) don’t take migratory birds out of season with out a license but 2) don’t tell me white suburbanites aren’t shooting them because they shit on their driveways, or people in poor rural areas because it’s free meat and they live a couple miles out side of town.
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Nobody properly watching that US/Melmac border.
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There was a family of Vietnamese refugees on my parents’ block that actually hunted the crows, pheasants, and geese in their backyard. It was actually a bit of a sad situation, as the welfare payments they got didn’t support their family, and they really only had minimum wage jobs. My parents and neighbors would bring over hot dishes to help out the family, and donated hand me downs for the kids.
They eventually got evicted because of it, but not for eating the wildlife. My dad said no one in the neighborhood cared about that, and they were also secretly happy the Canadian geese weren’t a problem for a couple years. It was discharging firearms in a residential area that was the issue.
But pets? Nah, no pet problems. If your pets go missing, it’s likely these two are the culprits:
eta:
I owes a beverage to @Mister44
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They used to use this exact trope to smear Chinese immigrants (political cartoons blurred for old-timey racism). This was already a tired, ugly smear 120 years ago.
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This guy could be a heartbeat from President
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Which is somethin’ else, 'cause Vance’s boss idolizes Hannibal Lecter.
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God. What a disaster.
“And how long have you been president of (check notes) Russia?.. OK.”
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