Select your shape! Stool Analyzer has thoughts on your poop

Hurrah! At last some credit given to the Bristol Stool Chart.

(Some friends of mine had a laminated Bristol Stool Chart on the wall of their toilet. Almost everyone who visited asked where they could get a copy).

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Jesus christ man. With what you eat, may your neighbors be all anosmic:

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Two inches across is insane. That’s a poo from an animal that has a much larger anal sphincter than a human’s. Like a cow, or a tiger.

Although diameter means two completely different things in math. And I have the feeling that they’re treating poo as a cylinder, where a diameter would really be an approximate circumference, and not it’s actual diameter.

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No kidding

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Wow! Judging from a GIS, Bristol Stool Chart cakes are a thing.

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As someone living in Bristol, I’m erm, conflicted, that we’re famous for our poo measuring.

Personally I vary from 6 to 2 from week to week. I blame my appendicitis, I was comfortably regular before that.

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My 15 month old already has me whipped in the diameter and consistency department. She takes after her mother, who could eat a bag of nails and gunpowder and still drop a 100/100 type 4 any day of the week (well, actually exactly every other day). Judging from what I saw this morning in her little potty, her old man at least has her beat in the ability to properly masticate and digest edamame, so that’s something.

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To the Victory thread!

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Alas. My resolution to turn over a new leaf lasted all of three hours. I tried having steamed chicken and veggies for lunch. But then I was still hungry. So I went across the street to the Dog Haus for a double cheeseburger, tater tots, and a chocolate shake.

And yes indeed: leftover Little Caesar’s pepperoni pizza for dinner. You know me too well.

Maybe this is a cry for help.

But anyway, Mister Teenybutt, a 2-inch diameter turd is neither unhealthy nor freakishly huge. Get thee to some leafy greens!

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My wife refuses to discuss this website with me.

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Stool Analyzer, or bOING bOING?

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Both most of the time but really the former.

“No, we aren’t talking about our shits. Our marriage cannot accept this.”

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Ive eaten leafy greens before. They taste the same going in as out. That’s why I efficiently eat mostly meat and cheese, and pave concrete in my wake.

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You ate them going out? Ew.

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Well… Taste is 90+% smell. And they smell the same no matter what my primitive primate gut does to them.

Next question: you smell your bowel movements? :slight_smile:

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And you don’t? You must have one hell of a ventilation system :smile:

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I was in Scotland recently.

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You’ve got one of those German shelf toilets, don’t you?

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