Select your shape! Stool Analyzer has thoughts on your poop

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is that a german toilet?

http://asecular.com/~scott/misc/toilet.htm

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Yep.  

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98/100

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What a load of shit.

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Why, yes he is! I’m off to create my morning specimen, and will report back with my findings by lunchtime.

Wish me luck, guys.

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strange. my favorite cow is super healthy!

(the “select size” question… Ugh!)

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Mine shows that “Your confidence seems a bit fragile at the moment, so steer clear of situations that are likely to be competitive in nature. You have nothing to prove, either to yourself or to other people – you were, are and always will be the best”, and my lucky numbers are 27 and 35. Also, I had peanuts recently.

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The Stool Analyzer is Craptastic.

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What does it say about me that my stool is this shape?:

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Ew, looks painful!

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this deserves a rainbow-coloured result seal with “Ouch!” on it

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“Boy, what did you eat?!”

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I got my “Nice Poop” badge!

edit: Now starting to worry that this basically describes all my badges.

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Contemplating that size turd is giving me cramps.

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“The ideal stool is at least two inches in diameter and twelve inches long”?!? Are we talking about porn star poop here?

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Oh dear.

I feel like such a failure.

I’d post a picture for y’all’s delectation, but I vividly remember, among the shortish list of things Antinous said never to post on the BBS, he admonished “no fresh turds.”

:disappointed_relieved:

But it was slightly pale, and kinda loose and raggedy, if that paints a picture for ya.

In my defense, the weekend was spent sweating my arse off at my old house, doing some renovations to correct some ancient code violations, and my diet consisted entirely of fast food, Gatorade, and Dr Pepper, with nary a vegetable in sight.

Turning over a new leaf today!

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