Spreadable Beer


#1

[Read the post]


#2

The fact that spreadable beer now exists is not a sign that the world’s end is upon us. It’s a sign that the world already ended and we are now living in a post-armageddon void.


#3

We already have this. It’s called Marmite. Apropos of nothing, my girlfriend bought me a pot of the ne plus ultra of alarming British spreadables, Gentleman’s Relish. It nearly made her sick (she is clearly no Gentleman, as it is fucking delicious)


? :question: :atom: Questions. Questions? QUESTIONS!? :atom: :question:?
#4

Of course, this isn’t actually spreadable beer. It’s marmalade with a hint of beer. And beer with a hint of marmalade. And a cannily worded press release.


#5

No, the real sign of the end: no affiliate link.


#6

They’re not the first to make jelly out of beer. We’ve had BeerAdvocate’s 5th-ranked beer in Jelly form for years!


#7

Reality TV coming soon: Beer-Jelly wars!


#8

Can anybody kickstart me on artisanal ale peanut butter?


#9

You can make your own REAL spreadable beer.

Ingredients:

1 bottle your favorite beer
1 box Knox® Unflavored Gelatin

Directions:

  1. In mixing bowl, sprinkle 1 pouch Knox® Unflavored Gelatin over 1/4 cup (50mL) cold beer. Let stand for 1 minute.
  2. Add 1/4 cup (50mL) boiling beer, stir constantly until granules are completely dissolved.
  3. Once the gelatin has been dissolved, add remaining beer.
  4. Pour mixture into a mold or bowl and chill until set.

Cautionary note: I have not tried this. Works with sparkling cider, though.


#10

I’ve just instructed Jeeves over at Amazon to send me a sample. Pray for me.


#11

THEY ARE SENDING SOME TO ME.  


#12

It will be brought to me, and placed at my feet.


#13

As with all things beer I will try it at least once.


#14

Marmite is more like beer leavings. More byproduct than product.


#15

If you like anchovies, you’ll be fine. It’s not for everyone, mind.


#16

You can take that beer jelly and shove it…in a donut and then shove it in my mouth.


#17

I believe I have some sort of savory stout jelly that I haven’t touched yet if you want to do a side-by-side comparison.


#18
Marmite on toast with a heapin' slab of butter, and potatoes, lots of potatoes.

What I survived on for most of 2000/2001. I’d do it again, too if I was rich this time.


#19

Why did I first read that as Beer Belly Wars?


#20

That too!