Stephen Colbert explains Jesus' position on ripping children from their parents to Jeff Sessions

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Remember people - obeying the law is biblically required when separating children from their parents into concentration camps.

But not when baking a cake.


So, let me get this straight, God chose Trump and Sessions and all the Fascist Clown Brigade to rule and thats why you should quietly obey their “laws”, or their intrepretations of laws.

Somehow, that did not apply when Obama was president. For reasons. God was having a vacation?


God was obviously testing the “faithful” for the prior eight years. Now He’s serious.



He shoulda hit up some other good ones:

Leviticus 19:33-34 ESV
“When a stranger sojourns with you in your land, you shall not do him wrong. You shall treat the stranger who sojourns with you as the native among you, and you shall love him as yourself, for you were strangers in the land of Egypt: I am the Lord your God. "

Though to be fair, we largely ignore Leviticus.

Hebrews 13:2 English Standard Version (ESV)

2 Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for thereby some have entertained angels unawares.

But I think the best verse about how to treat immigrants - or anyone - is this:

Matthew 25
34 Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. 35 For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, 36 I was naked and you clothed me, I was sick and you visited me, I was in prison and you came to me.’ 37 Then the righteous will answer him, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you drink? 38 And when did we see you a stranger and welcome you, or naked and clothe you? 39 And when did we see you sick or in prison and visit you?’ 40 And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.


“I am the Supreme Being. I’m not entirely dim.”


Yes, thank you Mr. President!

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I said it elsewhere: the nativists to whom this regime panders aren’t interested in actual solutions to the flow of illegal immigrants but rather inflicting misery and cruelty on brown people to gratify themselves. All of the partial quotes they cherry pick from the Bible won’t change that.


Sessions is clearly a very damaged individual.


No, he is a man doing his job. His job is to make sure America stays white and Christian because he believes that dark skinned people will drag the country down. Every brown person that crosses the border or is born in the US is a failure on his part, and he’s losing the war.

If you view his actions through the lens of severe racism all of his actions are internally consistent.


The crowd went crazy. It seems like religion is more popular when you shed all the hate and dominance.


While there may or may not be a “special” place in hell for Justin Trudeau, it’s pretty well established that there’s a regular ol’ place there for heretics who use the word of God to advance divisive personal agendas among and against believers. I’m sure Satan is keeping a seat nice and warm for Sessions, among others.

(If hell exists, of course.)


I cannot fathom how participating ICE officers are not being doxxed and harassed over this.

I’m not in favor or either behavior, but when you do inhumane shit under the excuse of “I’m just doing my job,” you’re actively aiding and abetting evil.


On a personal note, that shit-eating grin as he spouts nonsense makes me want to punch him in his fascist little mouth.


when I start seeing bible and nazi references that’s when I know absolutely nothing is going to change about this because people are out of options for dissent - you shouldn’t have to reach for either to know what’s right and wrong

there are 11,000 children being held right now - 11,000 - that number is mind boggling and we have to carefully consider what kind of people we are to allow systematic abuse in treating human beings this way


Many people invoke both for emphasis, and arbitrary defeatism sure as fuck doesn’t help anyone.


Mr. Sessions obviously is working from a different bible than the one I am familiar with. I seem to recall something about the greatest commandment being to love one another, but perhaps I’m mistaken.


I don’t believe in God.

I hope I’m wrong, because if so these motherfuckers are going to burn, burn, burn.


Heresy is the sixth circle in Dante’s Inferno. The third ring of the seventh circle, holding the blasphemers, may also be appropriate. Trump may end up in the eighth circle for fraud or maybe even the ninth for traitors to their country.