The 2019 Halloween Candy Hierarchy

This is why I like to eat a Zero bar, but only once every year or two.

I actually like the stuff. Last year I bought a bag and ate it with peanuts (together they taste like a Payday bar). This year my wife talked me out of it.

Yeah, I’d thought this was cleared up five years ago.

Some friends of ours moved into a new neighborhood a few years ago, and a few of their neighbors did this. There were even some “please take one” honor-system bowls out there. The neighborhood consisted of townhomes, so each door was like 12 or 18 feet from the next, meaning one could hit a lot of houses very quickly. My daughter did so well that she made a snow-angel in her candy.

In my old neighborhood we had one house that would give out cans of Coke, conveniently a door or two down from the dentist who gave out toothpaste or Trident.

My grandfather would keep bags of this around (from Cracker Barrel) as cough medicine. Speaking of candy… in his early dotage, he would keep peppermint or butterscotch lozenges in pocket. When we took him out (to eat, to shop, etc.) he would inevitably encounter a little kid, reach in his pocket and ask “Hello, do you want a piece of candy?” We had to explain (repeatedly) “Look, you just cannot do that…”

I also have to ask about gold coins, which should be at or near the bottom. Have not seen them in years. They tasted the way that mothballs smell.

EDIT: Aha! Palmer…

image

Agreed, although (IIRC) it’s bad for those with hypertension, and great for anyone feeling risky and wanting to induce labor.

We were supposed to have bad weather for trick-or-treating (in the D.C. area) but it pretty much held off (and the temperature was in the mid-80s when we got started). Really thin crowds out there last night, and more houses with the lights out. I figure a lot of people just gave up in advance.

1 Like