The Candy Hierarchy for 2016: Halloween's best and worst treats


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The results of our survey are in. This year’s list of the most loved and hated Halloween treats has a surprise in store!



Vindicated, at long last!




I don’t understand how kit kats can score so highly.


I would love the Person of Interest dvd collection. Where do I need to T or T to get dvds?


I like those orange marshmallow circus peanuts. I’m horrified to see that they rated even lower than Jack Chick comics. Then again, I love black licorice.


I think I am going to have to stop doing these surveys.

I will never,ever, understand the appeal of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups. I’ll just have to accept that you’re all wrong, and enjoy my black liquorice.


This is the least wrong candy ranking I have seen. Good job everyone.


Every year, I get only candy I like: castoffs from my kids’ loot. There’s an upside to liking the ‘wrong’ kinds of candy!


Typical biased liberal media afraid to include Whoppers in the poll lest it become clear that they have WAY more grassroots support than any of these other establishmint candies.


What I never, ever understand–as a malted milk ball fan–is how those who spit upon Whoppers will just as quickly spit out some pap about Maltesers being the ever so superior candy from Across The Pond™ (and they’re not, so huh? Not sure why I keep seeing that). Look, let’s be frank: a thin layer of milk chocolate is really not different from a thin layer of chocolate flavor when it comes to taste. They are both almost non-existent in taste and could really benefit from being a thin layer of dark (and I don’t care for dark chocolate). Just admit you don’t like malted milk balls, ya goof.


If you publish a Candy Hierarchy and still don’t know what Chick-o-Sticks are after ten years, someone should send a case of the things. (edit: I live in Chick-o-Stick country and haven’t seen fun-sized versions for Halloween since the 80s)


Nobody should spit upon candy, even Whoppers. That’s just gross. And juvenile. Grow up already.


I googled those, but I have to say I prefer the alternate reality where people hand out the other kind of Whopper. The logistics may be a bit complicated though.


I am pretty sure you can get an awesome exchange rate on black licorice for peanut butter cups.


Regarding the Friday/Sunday question, I responded that I prefer Friday but later wonder if I made the right choice. After all, on Friday I find myself at work. On Sunday I’m relaxing at home.


I hand out LEGO minifigs arranged on a large base plate, and let the kids choose one. Granted, this only works well because I don’t get a horde of trick-o-treaters, but the kids seem thrilled.


What is with the hate on Now n’ Laters? They’re lower tier but Starbursts aren’t? If anything, that should be reversed. Now n’ Laters offer a duality of experience–first a hard candy, then a chewy one! Plus they have more tartness than boring Starbursts.


I just moved into a new neighborhood with plenty of kids. Remembering past surveys, I stocked up on full-size Hershey bars and the 2-pack Reese’s.

Tonight, I am a god.


That’s an awesome idea for a super unique and memorable treat. I get 200-300 kids a night, easily, so I’ll stick to fun-size bulk Reese’s Cups!

We actually do a ‘candy hierarchy’ at my house with four separate candy bowls.

  • Most kids get the normal fun size bars, one or two each. Reese’s, Snickers, etc.
  • Teenagers in hoodies get Mary Janes or Dum Dum Pops.
  • Kids with amazing homemade costumes or acting skills get full size candy bars. We’ve had kids dressed as wizards do impromptu magic routines and kids dressed as pirates go into full on theatrical sword fights complete with rehearsed dialogue.
  • Kids with nut allergies get little packs of Play Doh or other little toys.