The worst knife reviewed

I also like how the maker’s mark isn’t even clear. It’s trying to say “Master” but seems to be saying “Masper.”

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Not to mention the middle school level logo.

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The tacticool kids love them. Something about stabbing “thugs” real good when “they” come for you.

Both are largely pointless in a pocket knife. Serrations are for cutting through rope more quickly. And the tanto points just look cool and make the knife cut worse.

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That logo is a pretty clear knockoff of the Benchmade butterfly:

Well, that didn’t work!

лоокинг фор тчис?

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Buck has some inexpensive knives made in the USA, like the Bantam and Nano Bantam. For around $20 you get a decent piece of steel, a solid if old-fashioned lock-back design, in some basic plastic that at least seems to not get slippery when wet. It’s the knife I carry every day that I’m not too upset if I lose it.

I use it as an example because it is 1. cheap (often under $20) 2. does the basic business of being a knife 3. don’t have to be made in China by the lowest bidder

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Disclaimer: I have a barely collection of about nine or ten knives (not counting my kitchen knives), some of which I use (mainly for camping and boxes) and a couple of which are functional display pieces. If nothing else, a pocket knife makes breaking down boxes for recycling a lot easier.

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I carry the Leatherman Wave and the hex, torx, phillips and flat insert bit accessories. It’s a life changer, with all those drivers, scissors, diamond hone, and saw blade in addition to the usual stuff, I can fix many things without running for tools as I maintain several multifamily buildings. Just today I used the torx to take apart a dishwasher control panel.

In the cars we keep one of these cheap sheathed paring knives in the glove. No worries about fruit juices getting into the joint of a folder when having road trip snacks.

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Okay, what is a real use case for fancy knives? Gutting fish? Scrimshaw? I confess to being one of those out-of-touch elites who basically have no knives other than cheapish kitchen ones.

Skookum as frig!

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Robertson and similar square drive screws and drivers are awesome. You can use the square bits in larger Phillips head screws and they won’t cam out as easily as the proper Phillips bit. Robertson screws seat more firmly on the end of the bit so you can free air aim the screw upward. Robertson screws/bits don’t cam out when you apply a lot of force either.

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Well the point of well made knives is that they work better. In that they take a sharper edge, that lasts longer. They hold up better to use (and abuse) over time. So you aren’t regularly replacing them. And your less likely to get hurt using them. Dull knives are dangerous, and bad knives are never sharp enough to prevent that. Badly made knives also tend to break during use. I’ve had some nasty run ins with cheap pocket knives. And as with anything else. Well made knives can be fixed when there’s a problem.

Just like anything else. And for whatever the hell you might be using them for.

Good knives /= fancy knives. And an expensive knife doesn’t guarentee a good one.

Again just like anything else.

That question is vague to the point of, well pointlessness. It’s like asking “what is a real use case for a fancy computer? Computertating things?”

I have nice kitchen knives. The “real use case there” is I’m less likely to lose a finger while skinning and boning a pork shoulder. I lose less meat in the process. And my knives stay sharp while I do it. I can cut things thinner and smaller without struggling. And more consistently. Because of a finer edge, thinner blade, etc. How ever “fancy” you may think my knives are, that’s the point. Not “fancyness”.

I have some decent outdoors knives. The “real use case” for that is I don’t mash the fuck out of a fish when I fillet it. And my utility knife doesn’t explode and take out some one’s eye when I use it to split kindling. (Hey and cool fact, both those knive cost less than $40 a piece, FANCY).

Besides all that. “Because I like it” has never been an invalid reason.

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Hey BoingBoing!

You should code an amazon link transmogrifier to capture affiliate links and turn them into Boing Boing affiliate links.

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That is exactly why i plan to get one of these

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What, no love for the humble Opinel?

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I wonder if anyone will be going on a pilgrimage to meet the Master of Bad Knife-Making?

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Because, how else would you know what 110+ year old army rations taste like?

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Can you believe it was modern Ukranian rations and not the 110 year old bully beef that gave him hepatitis? Let’s get it out on a tray. Nice!

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I’ve had this tiny, tiny Opinel on my keys for a few years now (Casio F-91W shown for scale):


It serves as something sharp I always have with me, useful for opening boxes, cutting loose hanging string from clothes, things like that. I’ve put it in the hold the last few times I went on a plane but when I forgot no-one seems to have noticed it in the x-ray tray (flying inside Europe).

I’m currently looking at getting the Spyderco bug, because it seems like it may be made slightly better (the Opinel sometimes opens in my pocket…):


But the price, and the fact that the Opinel still works, has stopped me from purchasing.