This robot crawls up your butt to examine your colon

Originally published at: http://boingboing.net/2017/06/16/this-robot-crawls-up-your-butt.html

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Rule 34 awaits…

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> Nobody looks forward to this.

Nobody? Asking for a friend.

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Butt-probing robot?

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I had my first ever colonoscopy last year, and the awesome doctor who performed the procedure (who let me watch, and was cracking jokes about butts and poop the whole time) said “I’ve been doing this for about twenty years, and I’ve had my little camera up thousands of buttholes. And I will tell you right now that colonoscopies are ridiculous. Fasting and prepping for days so you can have a camera shoved up your butt? What is this? Within five years we’ll either have a tiny robot sliding up there or – even better – you should just swallow a little pill that takes pictures of your colon as it goes through it.”

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Its the little gripper spikes that bother me.

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Does this go up into the small intestine? Because it doesn’t look like this has the capacity to handle the difference in diameter between the large and small intestine.

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Can I control it with my phone?

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Dammit! Yet another example of robots stealing jobs!

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A colonoscopy only involves the large intestine and bowels.

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Had my first a few weeks ago… if I never have to do that prep again, it will be too soon. And I’m gonna have to do it again in three years. The procedure itself? Literally blacked out, I couldn’t tell you if it was unpleasant. But the memory of drinking a Big Gulp’s worth of suprep just triggered my gag reflex.

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The prep was far far worse than the procedure. A week of low-fiber light-colored foods (wonder bread and plain yogurt) followed by days of a liquid diet, then the horrible prep liquid and its effects.

I heartily recommend that anyone who needs one should refuse all anesthesia beforehand. They don’t numb you, they use propofol to sedate you & give you short term amnesia to forget the procedure. It requires hours of laying in hospital afterwards and the memory-loss side effects of propofol are not enjoyable. The discomfort was about equal to taking a poop. Really no big deal, and you can walk out the door afterwards with no recovery time needed.

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It’s to ensure patient compliance.

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NO…just NO.

Yeah, Jesus, it has spikes - nope, nope, nope.

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robot - whatever - do you still have to do the Prep???

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Verily, the Prep sounds like the most unpleasant part of the procedure.

The instructions for MoviPrep, clearly written by somebody with a great sense of humor, state that after you drink it, ‘‘a loose watery bowel movement may result.’’ This is kind of like saying that after you jump off your roof, you may experience contact with the ground.

http://www.miamiherald.com/living/liv-columns-blogs/dave-barry/article1928847.html

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Will there be an over-the-counter retail model available to the public?

(Asking for a friend.)

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No, it doesn’t await. Maybe involving automatons, yeah.

Well, presumably those involved with adult entertainment of this nature have to prep first. Which itself returns us to Rule 34 – the actual colonoscopy prep. Although here I must profess complete ignorance/innocence.