Trump brags of new ‘super duper missile’

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2020/05/16/trump-brags-of-new-super-du.html

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Super Duper Boom!!

Fucker.

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FWIW Xeni I love the trademark 'impeached and manifestly unfit" prefix, always a valuable reminder, in some rosy future that’s what history books will say too.

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No, Xeni. Lasers go Pew Pew. Missiles go whoosh.

This is why we need really stable geniuses in charge of things.

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“super duper?”
Neato! Sounds okey dokey to me!

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I wonder how many Americans we could insure for the cost of one hypersonic missile prototype?

ETA- assuming the numbers I pulled from some quick googling are in any way accurate:

  • cost of 1 hypersonic missile ~ $600,000,000.00
  • cost of 1 year of platinum tier PPO insurance for a 21-year-old American male (it’s more if you’re a woman, note: hold rage for a different discussion)- $8,787.00
  • number of insured people for the cost of one missile prototype - 68,282

Draw what conclusions you will.

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Tonight the super duper missiles gonna find you
Shining like the sun
I’ll be having fun
Feeling like a number one*

Tonight the super duper beams are gonna blind you
But I won’t feel blue (pew pew, pew pew)
Like I never do (pew pew, pew pew)
'Cause I don’t give a fuck for you.

*(Not a Russian hooker reference. Honest.)

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NEW IMPROVED SUPER DUPER MISSILE

Kill more people, FASTER!

Lots of people are saying how quickly it wipes out whole cities. Unbelievable. So quick.

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Repo Man - everybody dead

[Ordinary, everyday people] running into death just like soldiers run into bullets … it’s a beautiful thing to see.
    (approximately) ~ Donald John Trump

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Yeah…
No. It really isn’t, is it?
Unless you’re some kind of sick fuck. (Him, not you, obviously.)

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Hey look over there! Faster than a speeding Covid. Combining the latest advances in smoke and mirrors with high tech diversionary overload, I crafted this little beauty with my own tiny hands - just when everyone was calling me a nogood asleep-at-the-wheel clown. Who’s crazy now?

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No. Not beautiful at all. @docosc had the best response to that soundbite:

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17 times faster, 5 times faster kind of fits in with hypersonic missiles as compared with high-subsonic cruise missiles.

However and that aside, Trump’s affect struck me as different – more subdued, even tired than is typical. Look at his eyes as he talks about the superduper missile.

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I call it the Super Duper Missile

Odd…Stormy Daniels called it a mushroom.

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Should someone get El Presidente some action figures to bash together in front of the camera; so we can have a super-duper missile and kung-fu grip?

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The Super Duper Missile!!

Now equipped with extra Duping power at no charge!! (massive R & D costs not included)

Dupe* anyone within the contiguous 48 states with this revolutionary new Weapon of Mass Distraction!!

Hurry order yours today!!

  • product does not contain any actual duping, results may vary
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ISWYDT

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I found a secret video of the first test flight of the new “Super Duper Missile”, but they haven’t perfected the Illudium Q32 Space modulator yet.

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