Trump to launch new 'American Idea' budget hotel chain with 'patriotic' theme


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Is there anybody left in the world who still believes that Trump’s presidency is not about making money for himself?


I’d rather sleep in my car



I’d rather eat my internal organs.


A wise decision.


Here is the American Idea as a budget hotel:


Please! Not the brain!


This is actually a really smart move.

In a few months the Trump name could be as marketable as used chimpanzee diapers; a chain of “golden age of America” themed hotels would be of lasting appeal to the delusional chumps who will continue carrying a torch for Forty-Five with an Asterisk. The hotel equivalent of Denney’s.

Maybe the doddering old sociopath can spend his ex-con years doing ribbon cutting ceremonies.

Also: These will be great places for con artists. Pick a centrally located table in the breakfast room, talk in a stage whisper to your accomplice as you go through a PowerPoint presentation about your new zero-point energy source that still manages to give off black smoke just to make the libruls cry.


Each will feature an eternal flame - surrounded by a dumpster shell


Will this “patriotic” theme include Confederate flags?


How many regular employees do you think they will hire before they hire an illegal?


three-star hotel chain with a patriotic flair

So with his brand name slapped on it we’re looking at 1.5 stars with Confederate regalia.



“Honey, look! The beds have rubber sheets.”

“It’s like The Donald read our minds!”


This is debuting in Mississippi, so – yes – I’d think so.


When it comes to wages, illegals get screwed over more, so I’d consider your question, but in reverse order.



“Oh, look. You get a free upgrade, Mr. Purdee. We’re putting you in our General Lee suite!”

{customer leaves}

“Wait, didn’t you just put Mr. Sims in the General Lee suite.”

“Oh . . . you’re new here, aren’t you? They’re all the General Lee suite, if their home town is down south.”

“And the upgrade?”

“A bidet. The Boss likes to watch videos of the rubes figure them out. Erik says waiting for the evening’s batch is the only thing keeping him alive.”


Honestly, that’s unfair to Denny’s.


I’m guessing that this take on retro-kitsch Americana won’t be nearly as dark and hilarious as Fallout’s flavor material is.