Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2020/02/13/whataburger-flasher-killed-by.html
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I’m sorry, sir, we don’t serve wieners.
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May that be a lesson to you, a final one at that.
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(What with the apparent chicken parm sammich in the image,) There’s a ‘chicken crossing the road’ joke in here somewhere.
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The remains of the unidentified man will be returned to Florida for burial.
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Poor fucker.
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I was going to tie this to the Impossible Burger, but that’s Burger King.
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From the article:
The officer did not pursue the suspect, as HPD policy is to not run across a freeway.
I would hope that’s the policy of most rational adults. The best winning move in a live-action game of Frogger is not to play.
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Try Smashburger. 
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Houston Man
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Being caught with your dick out, worst case scenario.
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I bet you the cops looked at what was left of the guy and said “what a burger”
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Damn, that poor trucker. Has to live with killing someone because that person was an idiot.
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“You know buddy, you can buy one of those burgers, take it home, and expose your lil pee-pee to it all you want, nobody will care. Hell, it’s not even illegal in Texas.”
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Whatawaytogo
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That’s like something out of a movie… only I bet the truck didn’t honk like they always do in the movies.
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“Whataburger” is the new euphemism for naughty bits.
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