That’s his nickname amongst the male escorts of Washington, DC.
Gracchus is just pointing up his grotesque hypocrisy.
Is it really?!? Sorry, i had no idea.
No need to apologise. You’re one of today’s lucky winners!
Still doesn’t mean mockingly outing people with playground-level queer insults is cool.
I have to admit, I’m conflicted about that nickname too.
Don’t get me wrong-- I have absolutely no interest in defending LG on anything. He’s a hypocrite and a leech who gladly attaches himself to anyone or anything that increases his own power, and that’s reprehensible.
But it’s not wrong in and of itself to be attracted to one’s own gender. That isn’t the problem at all. So I’m not sure that basing the insult in gendered terms isn’t a kind of kinkshaming, and that’s something I’m against in principle, even for assholes like LG.
Maybe we just need a better insult.
And even if members of an in-group use such terms, that doesn’t make it fine for out-groups to use them.
If somebody called me “Lindsey Graham” we’d have some words
Calling people out for shitty behaviour is one thing.
Name calling is something else when it uses slurs against any group.
You mock someone for their race, their gender, their sexual orientation then it’s YOU who are the asshole.
When what you say can hurt people mentally and physically then you need to watch what you say. For every “ha, gay!” insult thrown at Graham there’s going to be an uncountable number of out and closeted gay folk who get hurt. All you really did was add to their shame, which shouldn’t even be there.
When you throw the insult knowing it hurts people, who’s the asshole?
Involuntarily outing people seems to me to be problematic, even in cases where the facts are generally well known to everyone. Whatever façade we put forth with regard to our personal identity should not be the subject of shame unless someone is coopting a minority identity for personal benefit.
Lindsey Graham is despicable enough to criticize directly for the policies he espouses on his own.
I’m not really outing him. The sex workers did that, and they also came up with the nickname. For me it’s a way of highlighting (and mocking) his hypocrisy and cynical betrayal of other gay men using a term that members of a particular gay community (DC’s gay escorts) have come up with for him.
I don’t care who coined it.
If it wasnt an insult you wouldn’t be using it.
You know better.
So if you heard a black person call say, Ben Carson a –
Never mind. You know better.
I am using it as an insult, in regard to his hypocrisy and betrayal of those who share his sexual preferences. “Lady G” in and of itself seems to be the DC male escort community’s non-judgmental description of a certain client’s demeanour and/or preferences. That same description and the context it occurs within establishes him as a man who has sex with other men (also carrying a connotation of his closeted status). That’s why the people who coined it matters in this discussion.
Obviously I don’t care who he has sex with or how he acts with the sex workers he hires. On the other hand, I have no problem doing my part to out a man like that who uses his power to make life miserable for other LGBTQ people by using a term bestowed on him by gay men – one that has the added bonus of making Graham and his bigoted supporters very uncomfortable. I have a particular loathing for kapos and think that we should be merciless with them, even to the point of throwing them to the bigoted wolves they serve and associate with.
“Lady G” is not the same as the “N-word”. It’s a term used by a specific small community to describe one individual.
But since others here might understandably interpret my use of the term differently than intended, I’ll respect that and stop using it.
I’ve got no right to police what the sex workers say; I’m not a part of that community so I won’t make that call.
But-- words matter. It’s a tragedy that so many people feel such shame in their own identity and orientation that they feel a need to hide it or deny it. It’s even worse when that shame drives people to actively work against those like them, as LG has done. But the orientation itself isn’t and shouldn’t be shameful, or shamed, because that only reinforces the tragedy for others in the same boat. The hypocrisy is the issue-- call that out, sure.
It’s not dissimilar to those who complain when Trump is mocked for being fat, because they too are fat, and it hurts them in the process. It reinforces the concept that fat is somehow shameful, when it shouldn’t be. And the problem isn’t that Trump is fat-- it’s all the horrible things he says and does.
I think we’re obliged to consider how the words we use affect others, beyond the target of our ire. We can do better-- we should do better-- by calling out the actions and behaviors that do harm, not matters like orientation, which isn’t inherently shameful in itself.
It’s not on you to out him.
It’s not on anybody to out him.
There is no “but in this case it is OK if I’m homophobic, because he’s an asshole,” even if everybody agrees that the target is an asshole.
Because it makes him a target.
And targets of everybody else in their closets.
Knowing this and using it anyway is hypocrisy and in this context makes you no better than the man you intend to denigrate.
Very true. It’s an even bigger tragedy that some of those people use their position of power to export their misery to others. That’s the scumbag behaviour Graham should be mocked and shamed for.
Perhaps we should just use the description “noted anti-LGBTQ politician and frequenter of male escorts” as obligatory preface to any first mention of his name.
It’s not on me to out him for sure. But I don’t mind spreading the word when someone else outs him. Gay men don’t deserve to be outed, but closeted gay kapos with power do. I’m comfortable with that.
Did I fucking stutter?
How about mocking them for being in the closet while attacking LBGTQ rights?
How is that any improvement whatsoever?
It isn’t just the terms used that hurt people, so no.