Who's watching the GOP debate tonight?

wrath
21

I’m looking at Fox news buffering.

Twitter’s been more entertaining than usual, though.

22

Dang, now I has a sad that we don’t get broadcast teevee. This sounds really entertaining!

I’ll pretend I’m playing along and have a beer anyway.

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23

Trump, you ass, the question wasn’t about Iraq, we’re on social issues right now dumbfuck.

“Straight Outta Compton” ad just played. Half of the FOX audience just left the living room to make sure the AR-15 was still loaded and “ready for the race war”.

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24

This link is illegal and you should not use it:

Also, you’d let tigger drink Bud Light? WHAT THE DEUCE

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25

Blame the internet! My non-existent cat only drinks quality microbrews.

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26

I’ll treat this with all the respect I have for the sacred principle of DRM.

Totally unrelated, wow, these people are incoherent.

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27

Iran released those hostages after Reagan was elected because he backdoored Carter, Mr. Cruz.

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28

Did The Scottster just use a quote from Stalin to describe how he’d run the US military?

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29

Replace B-52s? Weird thing to make a statement about.

Increasing the already absurd military budget is crazy talk at best. I’m sure one of them just talked about putting nukes in Ukraine.

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30

Party game:

  • Reagan quoted: do a shot

  • assumed they will run against Clinton: mainline 10mg smack

  • dog whistle: speedball

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31

350 ship Navy, 2600+ Chair Force? The fuck are you talking about Chris?

But stay tuned, cause Megyn’s gonna talk about…God.

My bingo card is in flames and Owen Wilson is gonna save his family from the invading dictator hordes. But I’m not suffering from constipation or irregularity, so at least there’s that.

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32

Wait. Do I crush the dogwhistle before I speedball it, or does that come AFTER I mainline Clinton.

OH GOD WHO’S RECEIVED A WORD FROM GOD

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34

also:

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35

Springer wouldn’t do it… wasn’t he a democrat?

36

Fix the VA by firing people!

But also hire more soldiers and start more wars!

And cut taxes and spend less money!

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37

It’s 2015. A question for candidates for the Presidency are asking if they’ve received a word from Dog. And it’s a male Dog, okay, not a trans Dog or a Dog that wants to sexytime other male Dogs okay?
Also, blood of jeebus christ and my mother’s father was a blessing who blessed Dog and he would know because he was a mailman and married to an evangelist who made America great. Um. And it’s time to move beyond that, whatever that is.

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38

takes me longer to void my bladder then they get for closing statements.

It’s not fair, but maybe it’s God’s way of showing Mercy.

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39

FUCKING HELL CHRISTIE SEPTEMBER 11TH YOURSELF ALREADY

invalid body my ass computer my father was a godamn hero and im’ a diffrent kinda new american century

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40

Yes, but does that mean that he wouldn’t do it? It probably just means Fox wouldn’t let him.

When I read about the debate though, I just pictured it being a blowhard circus of kookdom, so I mentally elected Springer to preside over it.

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