Woman doesn't want to leave Red Lobster

If we’re trying to get people dispersed in a two-dimensional space to double their average distance from each other, doesn’t the number of patrons have to be cut by a factor of 4?

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It’s a funny old world.

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SLOBTERRED

…just saying.

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Look, there are lots of underprivileged communities without a David Chang or Guy Fieri franchise to go to. Some people just have to make do with what the good lord provides.

/s

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She was fighting for a refund.

Are you saying you’re not a real enough Murican to fight for your right to refunds?!!

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Welpschmerz

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No idea. All I know is that the plan – such as it is right now – is to remove half of the chairs. They can’t eliminate half of the tables because they have nowhere to store them.

And I have no doubt that groups of people will move chairs around so they can all sit together. They already have people calling to ask when they will start allowing parties again.

All we know is whatever happens, there’s no way it won’t be a shit show because too many people around here are entitled fucks.

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Any ‘danger money’ for the staff? :wink:

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Nope. But apparently they have a box of actual masks on order now. From the time this really kicked into gear they’ve been getting by with handmade masks.

From what I know second-hand about the manager, I expect he’s greatly underestimating how many they will need. But he also may not have been able to get a large order through, since they aren’t a chain restaurant.

He didn’t want to order any more condiment cups because he was upset that they were going through them too fast.

As was explained to him, they are going through them fast because there’s no other way for customers to leave with peppers and parmesan cheese for their pizza without them. They obviously couldn’t use the shakers. His response, “Oh, yeah.”

He usually works only in the morning, before they open, so he has no idea what is going on after about 9am. But make no mistake, he has the highest salary.

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The owner of the Cape Cod ice cream shop set up a GoFundMe for the employee who was harrassed into quitting, to replenish the college funds she was supposed to be making while working there this summer. Last I looked, a few hours ago, it had raised $38,000.

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Dude, I don’t know what it was about that summer, but I made the most massive tips!

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At the grocery store I can get Red Lobster branded cheddar bay biscuit mix. Just dump in a bag of shredded sharp cheddar, add some water, mix, portion, and bake. Before they are finished melt butter and mix in the included herb packet and drizzle over the finished biscuits.

They taste exactly like they do at the restaurant, and you don’t have to go to Red Lobster which is a pretty big bonus.

ETA not that I’m surprised but @joed has an even less boujie solution

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My kids call it “Red Blister”. Not an anagram, but close enough

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Stop trying to make Welpschmerz happen. It’s not going to happen!

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Sounds like a member of the Red League of Super-Villains: Red Skull, Red Lobster, Red Riding Hood…

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Red Riding Hood was a secret agent for the West German government.
At least in the John Cleese version.

If you want a goldmine of the stupidity I’m forced to deal with in PA, check out talkback 16: https://www.wnep.com/mobile/section/talkback

I promise you won’t be disappointed.

Circa 1993, it was voted “Most Romantic Dinner” in Waco TX.

And speaking of, it’s as good a time as any for this reminder: