Okay, how bout um, a morning after slice of cold pizza crust that someone dug out of JD Vance’s couch?
Am I getting closer? 
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I think that you misspelled “crotch”.
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[Where is my (Where is my puke emoji!?!)]
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I’ll second @DukeTrout :
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Right? It’s just silly because the facts around her relationship with Brown were public knowledge going back at least to the early 2000s (ETA: performing further research, their “companionship” was reported as far back as at least 1994). All this stuff was dredged back up when she was running for her first public office (which was also well after she and Brown had ended their relationship).
It’s kind of funny – when Brown was politicially active, he was exactly the kind of swampy politician Trump likes to rail against. But, apparently Trump trusts what he has to say? Weird flex, but ok. (This assumes he actually said any of the things Trump claims he said which is doubtful. For some reason I doubt Trump has Willie Brown on speed dial or that they ever actually talk to one another.)
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It occurs to me that I don’t think I’ve seen or heard Trump laugh even once during all the decades he’s been on TV and film. Not when he starred in comedy films, not when he was at the White House Correspondents Dinner, not at the Alfred E. Smith Memorial Foundation dinners when political candidates usually try to show their lighthearted sides.
I just googled “Trump laughing” to see if I could find anything and the closest matches were just clips of Trump making cruel jokes or letting out a single mean-spirited chortle in response to something someone else said. I honestly don’t think he is capable of expressing what most people would think of as “joy.”
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Right? And after all, how could he enjoy a genuine laugh, being the absolute embodiment of white male grievance that he is?
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Shark, battery, windmill, camera, TV!
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Person, woman, Hannibal Lecter, friend, dinner!
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… only the best lobes, like nobody’s ever seen
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Time was that even the most evil of villains could enjoy a good laugh once in a while. Trump doesn’t even have that going for him.
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I know I’ve mentioned this before as well. He’s always struck me as one of the most dour, serious, and joyless human beings out there. Even his profile picture on social media is him scowling. Although he also strikes me as exactly the kind of man that would tell a woman that “[she] should smile more”.
It seems to me like his “jokes” are really just, “say something you know will offend and outrage, and then leave it up to your surrogates to try to say you were just trying to be funny”.
From what little I actually watched of the RNC, there were multiple people saying how Trump has such a great sense of humor. So great that there’s basically zero documentary evidence of this in approximately 1 million hours of footage of him talking over the past 40 or so years? Yeah, I don’t believe a single word of that.
Obama is so good at timing and delivery he could have done stand-up comedy if that whole politics angle didn’t work out. Probably yet another reason Trump is so jealous of him.
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On top no less!
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Thank you for taking one for the team!
Now I gotta lay down coz I was doing shots instedda playing bingo…
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Well, there was that one time… but even then, the smile didn’t reach his eyes.
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For your service, you deserve your puke emoji.
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There’s a name for that: Schroedinger’s Douchebag
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“When I use a word, it means just what I choose it to mean — neither more nor less .”
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Now you’re just egging us on.
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